The Start.

Oh. I’ve been meaning to start something like this for awhile.

So here I am, sitting in my car (deliciously new & smelling scrumptious from my pumpkin spice air freshener) in front of a dry cleaner. I did just drop something off – one of the MANY bridesmaid dresses that I own – we will get into that later – so I am not just creepily sitting here.. Well it definitely looks creepy.

Welp, this is a great start to my blog let me tell you! I am trying to be more positive in life – more happy. Trying is the key word here. I did get a tattoo on my foot when I was 19 with my best friend that says, “Live Laugh Love” which I thought I followed. Then I went to therapy for 2 years and came to the conclusion that I was an angry & mean person – but so what? I am allowed to feel these emotions and be this way. DUH I know that but I don’t LIKE that I am angry & mean so I ignore that side.

Aren’t you just loving this already?! Hehe. I seem like a crazy person when I go back & re-read what I wrote but – I never erase! No way. Not when I’m in the moment.

So the whole reason I wanted to start this is because – and I’m sure everyone says this about their lives – you can’t make this shite up! You just can’t. And it is my crazy & chaotic life but it really amazes me sometimes – and I want to look back on it and laugh – and think to myself: Self, those weren’t such hard times! Relax! 😳. I like emojis & I don’t curse.

I’m being random in this first post because.. I did have something specific to write about but I don’t want to start off with that. Maybe I will write about it in a little.

I don’t like confrontation. I was told that I was always wrong when I was younger & was never allowed to talk back to my parents & it was their way or the highway & I didn’t have a say in anything. I’m sure this happened in many a household & probably still does. But this effed me up. I don’t know how to get my feelings out without typing it out & being organized about it. It’s just my way & it has frustrated my exes to the max. But I can show feelings, etc. Just can’t discuss. Yeah no. Don’t go there. So you see how this is easy for me & therapy & chatting – not so much. Didn’t go anywhere. I definitely learned some things about myself.. But not for me at this moment in time.

Anywho. I’m on my cell phone and this is hurting my thumbs. Until next time!

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